Some people make you excited to party. You hear they’re going to be there and you get fired up immediately. They’re a good time, and good times are had with them. You can’t wait to get a few drinks flowing in their presence.
And then… there are the opposites to that. People who make you want to stay home. People who ruin everyone else’s night. Consistently.
They exist. They’re everywhere amongst us. And look, we’ve all at one point or another made mistakes, and been one of these. But that’s okay, as long as we learn from our mistakes. Some never do. So, let this guide help you with who not to be, and to help you to identify some classic party killing people to avoid.
1. The un-generous
Let’s be honest, if you’re in a big group where everyone is buying rounds of drinks and one person always dodges, that gets super annoying. A real personal pet peeve. Alcohol and other substances exaggerate personal dispositions. Therefore, in all likelihood, if you’re a generous person by nature, when you’ve had a few adult beverages you're going to get super generous, and vice versa. Yes, being generous will hurt your bank account and you’ll often wake up with severe financial anxiety… but that's the preferable way to live. Better at the end of the day to be one who lives generously and helps create good times. Also, when you wake up with that regret, just know that we are right there fighting with you... On the other hand, people who are stingy and let other people hook them up all the time? And start to expect it!? Holy shit that’s annoying. Red flag central. Fuck those people. Don’t be that way. If you can’t afford to be generous, no worries, make that clear, say that to everyone and take responsibility for yourself. Then it’s on them if they want to hook you up. Or... just take a few weekends off and save up you goose.
2. The breakdowners
Now, we all go through tough periods. Tough moments happen, tough nights happen, breakdowns happen.
However. Some people make this habitual. You know who they are. They inevitably go too hard too early then have a breakdown about any number of a myriad of bullshit problems that are not what you want to be discussing on a night out partying. These folks don’t do it on the very rare occasion, they do it regularly.
For some, it’s an attention grab. They need to be the centre of attention, and so, feeling powerless, this is the only way they can make it about them. Insecurity manifest… regardless of the cause though: not fun people to party with. It’s about everyone having a good time. If you’ve got some shit you need to work through, do it with your best friends or family or therapist somewhere private, don’t make the whole party stop and pity you. Don’t be that person. Avoid partying with that person.
3. The fighters
Some people are blessed (like yours truly) with turning into big puddles of love the more they booze. The alcohol triggers a dopamine response, sometimes oxytocin too. Others go the opposite way and get angry. Like really angry. Like they always start shit with people and get in altercations when they drink.
Look. It’s just a fucking massive drag to deal with. Fights or altercations ruin everyone’s night. Ok, sometimes you have to stick up for yourself, sometimes it happens, and sometimes it’s necessary. But like the breakdowns, if the altercations (physical or not physical, doesn't matter) are happening to you or a friend regularly? Time to figure out why and make some hard decisions. Fighting ruins one’s own night and someone else’s night, win lose or draw. And, it’s fucking dangerous. One bad fall on concrete and that’s a life gone forever, and a life spent in jail. De-escalate, put ego aside – that’s a real show of disciplined coolness.
If you’re the sort of person going out actually looking for fights… well you’re probably not reading this blog are you because let’s face it you probably don’t read much of anything at all… But if you are reading this, and you are that person, you’re a fucking idiot and clearly deeply insecure and angry with some part of yourself or your life. Get help. Help yourself. You’re not fun, you’re not helpful to society, and you’ll inevitably get your ass whooped by someone who actually knows what they are doing. Fuck your fragile overinflated ego. If you constantly have to prove how tough you are…. you’re not tough.
4. The judgementals
We can all be guilty of this sometimes. However, there are some sorts of people who just shit on everything constantly and judge everyone around them all the time. Likely, it stems from their own insecurity, a need to put everyone down to make themselves feel better. But, fuck, a party isn’t the time for a philosophical thought like this!! Doesn't matter what causes it, the fact is they’re super annoying to hang out with. Nothing is ever good enough for them. They’re always too cool. This other party or other place is always better, and they talk down on everything. Most importantly, you feel you can’t really let your hair down or they’re going to judge, gossip, and talk shit about you the next moment they get. Fucking barrrrrfff (pro tip: fuck them, do what you want anyway)... We are of the opinion that any situation can be made a blast with the right attitude and the right people. Judgemental types bring everyone down and suck to party with.
5. The easily-offended
Gosh there’s a lot of these. One person in a group can ruin the whole vibe if they can’t take a joke. Everyone else feels they have to walk on eggshells, and it's annoying. Now, let’s be clear: there are also lines, and there is also bullying. However, people who can’t give or take banter are an absolute snooze fest and suck to party with. They make everything about them, and finding things to be offended about and get angry with people about gives them a sense of self-worth and power that they are clearly lacking in any true, deep sense. You can’t bring them to some places, you can’t bring them to some crowds, shit, you basically can’t bring them anywhere! Annoyance level 100, don’t be them, avoid partying with them.
6. The rude or the mean
Few things are more mortifying than sitting at a restaurant or a bar with someone who is being an asshole to the staff working there. Holy shit. Rude or not nice people are just a red flag in general, let alone partying. Leave them to live their lonely shit lives devoid of self-reflection and wondering why everyone’s an asshole to them. Hint: if you think one person around you is an asshole, it’s probably them… if you think everyone around you is an asshole – YOU’RE PROBABLY THE FUCKING ASSHOLE. Don't party with assholes.
At the end of day it’s not too difficult: spread love, spread fun, spread support, and set clear, firm boundaries. Your partying life will flourish. BoozeDaddy over and out.